Second String Morts

Ego, the living planet is a sentient planet in the Marvel Universe who often feuded with Thor and, on occasion, the Fantastic Four. For a sentient planet, Ego did some very unplanetlike things, such as cruising around the galaxy under its own power (stubbornly refusing to follow its orbit), and "consuming" smaller, less conscious planets. Although they have met a number of times, Ego and Galactus have never had a truly definitive match.

In the latest issue of Marvel Adventures The Avengers, the Avengers book that is geared more towards kids, Ego reappears and tries to romance Earth with humerous and futile results.

So last week, in the midst of the horrible weather that hit us in Dallas, we temprarily lost power in the Hylemon home. With no TV, DVD, video games, or computer (my stupid laptop has a bad battery), I became desperate for some sort of entertainment (Jennifer was gone at Bunco, so I couldn't even have a good conversation with anyone other than the cats). The blackout led me to my back issue collection, and to the series starring our latest Morts. For a series that only lasted 24 issues (many of which were co-opted by their predecessors), the series was a surprisingly good read. So, can you name the team, as well as the individual members?

The World's Largest Love Mort-chine

Well, I put up an Indy Mort and you get quiet on me all of a sudden. I'm sure that it is because I have stumped you with my massive Comic Book knowledge and not because everyone I know who posts on this site either had a kid this week or is related to someone who did. Oh well, hopefully you'll get a chance to play this week in between changing diapers and warming bottles.

For the record, last week's Morts were Cassie Hack and her partner Vlad from the Devil's Due publication HACK/slash. Cassie was the lone survivor of a horror movie-esque slasher named "The Lunch Lady", who also happened to be her mother. Now, she travels the globe hunting these slashers and killing them before they can kill innocents. After several one shots and a mini-series, HACK/slash will begin an ongoing series in May.

The newest Mort was the star of the funniest comic I read this week. Good luck!

Gothic Mort

The Devil is in the details as they say, and I was sad to se that although Randy correctly identified the mort as a, "marvel bunny", he was unable to identify the mort as the, "Hoppy, the Marvel Bunny". Oh well, I guess he will have to settle for his consolation prize, a bouncing baby boy! Congratulations to the Price family!

Back to the Mort, Hoppy started out as a parody of the Marvel Family. When he spoke the magic name of Shazam, he gained the powers of the gods Salamander, Hogules, Antlers, Zebreus, Abalone, Monkury (yep, ladies and gentlemen, them's animal puns). With time, Hoppy was moved into the proper Captain Marvel Earth, which would eventually become the proper DC Comics Earth post-Crisis on Infinite Earths. Time will tell, one supposes, whether or not Hoppy exists in a post Infinite Crisis world.

Okay, new Morts are up. This one will stretch you, I think, but they have recently become stars of their own monthly comic. Good luck!

Easter Bunny Mort

Walter Kovacs was Rorshach in the fictional Watchmen universe, a dystopian future where America won the Super Hero arms race, Nixon repealed the 22nd amendment and won his fifth Presidential term, and the world moves ever closer to Nuclear Holocaust. The passage of the Keene Act, which required all Super Heroes to register with the government (yeah, DC thought of it first), has made the streets a dangerous place for the common American civilian. Rorshach is the one hero who chose Captain America's side. He's also a paranoid psychotic with homicidal tendencies. As Randy and I discussed in the comments, Watchmen isn't for everybody, but it's not as bad as you would guess and certainly worth an attempted reading if you get the chance.

Just in time for an Easter, I have this latest Mort. Enjoy.

Who Watches this Mort?

Bob Jones IV was a mild mannered employee of a savings and loan when his boss, who was secretly evil, performed genetic experiments on him to turn him into Captain Rectitude. The good Captain had super strength, speed and durability, as well as the ability to project "destructive plasma blasts" from his heart shaped chest emblem (How's that for a "Care Bear Stare"). Most ironically, the genetic testing, "replaced his normal biological drives with a synthetic anti-smut instinct" which made him wage war against anything he thought was unwholesome. For those of you unaware, the Marvel Character She-Hulk spent most of the 80's in provacative "cheese-cake" style splash pages, so Captain Rectitude and Shulkie squared off a couple of times.

This week's mort is sadly not obscure at all and I'm betting several of you will know the answer right away. So, what do you see when I show you this picture: